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/u/OkPrune1752
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I am writing this out of desperation, I am 18 years old male just finished high school. Since I was a kid I've had trouble picturing my future career, and how it would be like, I even thought of not going to college because no career "fitted me". I grew up liking science, which made both my parents proud ( my mother is an engineer and my father a chemist). I studied at a private highschool where the student chooses a field to focus in ( science , arts or business), this serves as a "preparation" for college. To be honest I always wanted to study business, but my mother dragged me into science, because she belived that it was the option which allowed me to go to any major with some degree of preparation. which clearly isnt true. Fast Forward by the age of 15-16 I told my parents I wanted to be a lawyer, years of debate experience and participation in youth leader camps led me to that conclusion, nonetheless they were concerned and driven by the idea that I was "severily desoriented" . They mentioned that law is a "dirty" major and that will be automated at some point, and that I am build for science. They were so worried their son would actually study law that they then enrolled me in some robotics and engineering course for teens which led to a national competition. I ace through and won the national competition in my first year, I got invited to TV shows for interviews and stuff, which actually made my parents happy. Also I forgot to mention that my best friend ( lets call him Joe) is going to study computer science and my parents were so Excited for him, Him and myself are Top 1 and Top 2 students in the School (respectively ). I truly like my friendship with him, although my parents usually compare us and mention how he " has his shit together" and is always winning over me, I got eventually used to this comments. This situation kept going on for a year until I genuinly wanted to study computer science, I believed so. My parents were so happy. They use to brag it to their friends and I actually felt happy about it.
But the Problem is now, in the present days. I got accepted to study at a great Computer Science programs at top universities and I am really happy about that, but recently ( 2 months ago ) I have been doubting on wether this is the major I actually Want to study. And the truth is that it is not, I feel like I have been lying to myself, like I have focused on tracing Joe's steps and I have lived the life my parents want me to live . And I about 2 weeks I have to submit my final decisition to my computer science offer, and I all I can think of is how great of a lawyer I could've been and how passionate I feel around it. Today is my third sleepless night, because the thoughts of my future do not let me sleep. I am bottom line pathetic, I remembered starting a show on lawyers like 3 days ago and I got my eyes all watery, because I truly believe I want to live a similar life, But I may never will.
Finally ( I do not want to make this too long) I have tried to speak my mind with my parents and tell them how I feel, but they rather look at me in disapointment or tell me be mature. and they go and tell them friends that no matter what I decide they will always support me, when in reality they do the opposite.
What should I do ( Help)
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But the Problem is now, in the present days. I got accepted to study at a great Computer Science programs at top universities and I am really happy about that, but recently ( 2 months ago ) I have been doubting on wether this is the major I actually Want to study. And the truth is that it is not, I feel like I have been lying to myself, like I have focused on tracing Joe's steps and I have lived the life my parents want me to live . And I about 2 weeks I have to submit my final decisition to my computer science offer, and I all I can think of is how great of a lawyer I could've been and how passionate I feel around it. Today is my third sleepless night, because the thoughts of my future do not let me sleep. I am bottom line pathetic, I remembered starting a show on lawyers like 3 days ago and I got my eyes all watery, because I truly believe I want to live a similar life, But I may never will.
Finally ( I do not want to make this too long) I have tried to speak my mind with my parents and tell them how I feel, but they rather look at me in disapointment or tell me be mature. and they go and tell them friends that no matter what I decide they will always support me, when in reality they do the opposite.
What should I do ( Help)
submitted by /u/OkPrune1752
[link] [comments]
Continue reading...